It is the biggest misunderstanding of the spiritual paths that giving out love brings more love, that effort should be applied to giving out love and we should do it even if it means sacrificing ourselves. It is a misunderstanding because whilst in simple terms it is true, it is only true in one instance and that is when you know how to love yourself. Yet here again this issue is complicated by words such as vanity,narcissism and selfishness. Words are so limiting that even here, if you can’t look beyond to them, you will find yourself trapped in a cycle of spiritual confusion.
Loving self first is not a selfish, vain act. Once you have internalised spirituality, taking care of your spiritual well-being before all else is a necessity, because you begin to understand that if you do not have spiritual well-being you are unable to give anything of positive spiritual value to anyone. Indeed, giving love without spiritual awareness is vanity, narcissism and selfish, because the very reasons you are doing it is to benefit yourself.
The best way to know if you are getting it right or wrong is see if you are appreciated by those who are receiving what you are giving. If they don’t appreciate you then you are getting it wrong. You can’t force people to accept what you give and you can’t force them the like it; in giving surely a key component is that the person receiving appreciates it.
Having understanding of this process is a major step on the spiritual path. Working with it and getting it right can take time, but it is so worth your attention. There is nothing more fulfilling in life that to go through life being a person who is in the right place at the right time giving what is needed with no effort or sacrifice at all and in return when you need the help there is always the perfect person there giving it allowing you to experience the wonderful sense of appreciation that comes with receiving it.
Life is meant to be easy.